Due to the situation on Frat row,
the University has gone into a massive amount of debt in order to launch a
national “UT isn’t that bad” publicity campaign
– showing Tennessee students going to church, performing acts of
community service, and doing other things that are not nauseatingly unholy.“We have been having quite a few difficulties with this endeavor,” William Vaughn said. “No matter where we go to film students in Knoxville, we always manage to capture something nasty. Just yesterday, we videotaped students leaving Ayers, but in editing we found a used condom hanging over a bench in the back ground… What the hell is wrong with people?!”
After throwing a book at the wall, William Vaughn went on to say “And the whole place looks like something out of I Am Legend… with all of the butchered roads and trash strewn around the streets, I feel like I am the last man on earth.”
In an attempt to take advantage of our situation, the University of Alabama is launching an “at least our students don’t buttchug Franzia” campaign in order to make them seem less backwards than they really are. UT responded to this campaign with an “at least our students can read” campaign
By Sly Stone
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