Graphic Design major Tylar Davis has a new passion:
Helvetica. According to sources close to
the junior, Davis has “literally been unable to shut up” about his enthusiasm
for the titular typeface of “Helvetica: A Documentary” since viewing the film
over two months ago. What started as an
extra-credit assignment for his 400-level 'Typography' course quickly evolved
from a passing interest into a self-professed “religious awakening” for the
eccentric junior.
“The upper
case 'R' – my personal favorite – has a little kink in the tail, the lower case
'a' contains a teardrop in the whorl!
Even the upper case C just 'feels' more balanced,” said Davis, fully
demonstrating the absurd depth of his font-snobbery. True to form, Davis never lets an opportunity
pass to advocate for Helvetica's “clean
curves” and “reassuring character.” But
while his exuberant obsession with the typeface seems benign now, it wasn't
long ago that Davis struggled with a darker side of his devout Helviticism.
“These days
he's just annoying, but the first few weeks were...” Ben Jackson, Davis'
roommate of two years, began to trail off as he furrowed his brow.
“He must
have watched that documentary like, 7 or 8 times in the first week. By the end he was reciting the voice-over
word for word along with the video,” said Jackson. Davis' zen-like devotion to the film was just
the beginning however. “By the end of
the second week he was muttering about typefaces under his breath,” said
Jackson. “It was actually a bit
unnerving.”
By the
third week, Davis was showing increased signs of a deepening psychosis. Outbursts about “inferior” sans-serifs were
common, and he began on a mission to expunge such substandard fonts from his
day-to-day life. It was during this
darkest time line that he reportedly threatened a family member after receiving
a party e-vite that primarily used Times New Roman. A friend of Davis' – Brian Nolen – used Comic
Sans in a promotional flyer for an on-campus event, Nolen's current whereabouts
remain a mystery.
But while
rumors swirl, Davis insists that he's “really just super passionate about
Helvetica,” and that he doesn't know anything about Nolen's disappearance.
“I'd have
no problem with signing an affidavit confirming my innocence – as long as the
statement is in Helvetica.”
By: Tween Wolf
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