For many singles, February 14 is a day to reminisce on why
they are spending yet another night alone, and why this year’s Valentine’s Day
was no different from last year’s. Many assume that if only they had someone to
spend this arbitrary day with, they could finally be happy. However, a new
study from the University of Missouri found that Valentine’s Day is just as
stressful and unhappy for those in a relationship. “I don’t want to take a girl
out on Valentine’s Day because she might think things are more serious than
they are,” said a sophomore who prefers to remain nameless just in case the
girl he’s casually sleeping with reads this. Even those in a serious
relationship find the holiday excessive. “It’s a lot to remember…birthday,
anniversary, Valentine’s Day…it’s too much,” said yet another anonymous boy.
Critics of
the study say that perhaps it is only men in relationships that are terrified
by the thought of Valentine’s Day. However, Mizzou claims that women also have
a problem with this day. “I have to shave my legs in the middle of February?
That’s ridiculous,” says freshman Abby Corkins. Many others echo her sentiment.
It seems
that for students of UT, the grass is always greener on the other side. Singles
want to be in a relationship, and people in a relationship want to be single. But
everyone can agree that the best part of Valentine’s Day is afterwards when all
the heart-shaped candy goes on sale. Because nothing blankets deep seated
depression like sitting in a room with the lights off while gorging oneself
with Reese’s. No judgment here; chocolate loves everyone. Of course, if Lent
restricts the consumption of sweets, nothing will cure the sadness. The only
sign of hope will come from the sweet embrace of death.
Luckily,
Valentine’s Day has now passed, and everyone has another eleven months to
either try to find someone to love or just someone to go out with one night in
February. Stay classy, UT.
By: Anita Knapp
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