Candidates Interrupt Each Other, Kanye Interrupts Candidates

Attendees at this past week’s presidential debate were witness to a bizarre sight not originally aired on network or cable television.  While the debate was characterized by both candidates typically interrupting and talk over one another, at one bizarre juncture,  Kanye West stepped in to express his own unique take on matters of national importance.

“Imma let you finish, but I just wanna say... Ron Paul had the best platform of all time!”

The moment seemed to stun both major parties’ respective candidates, but as time went on, they seemed to welcome his entrance into the debate.

“I don’t know what’s better: gettin’ paid or gettin’ laid,” interjected Kanye during an exchange about the economy.  “What I mean by that is.. you see, they be a lot a people in America today who ain’t got no work.  They ain’t getting’ paid.  But that don’t mean you can’t get laid.  Don’t lose hope America, Kanye’s got your back!”

In a CNN insta-poll, the results showed  24% believed Obama won the debate, with 21% declaring Romney the victor, and 55% pledging their vote to Kanye.

Pundits have been quick to speculate on the long-term impact of a Kanye candidacy.  Democratic political adviser James Carville mused that Kanye had a strong chance of playing spoiler for Obama in many swing states as “most Romney supporters don’t listen to real music like Kanye West.  His lyrical genius will play right into the Republicans’ hands by siphoning off votes from Obama.”  Republican strategist Frank Luntz had a different take, “Everyone knows Kanye is the voice of a generation.  He has a real chance to win this thing outright.”

In closing remarks at the debate, Kanye had his best performance of the night – a moment many pundits are proclaiming as the tipping point in the race.  “I am not a fan of books, I would never want a book’s autograph.  I am a proud non-reader of books,” he began, “I feel like I’m too busy writing history to read it.  If I was just a fan of music, I would think that I was the number one artist in the world.  I still think I’m the greatest.  That is why you should vote for me, the lyrical genius and voice of a generation.  Also, George Bush still doesn’t care about black people.”

By Tween Wolf